Press-ganged

Malevolent idle hearsay was received, functionally, without question, via email the following morning, from an unaccountable personage; an unspecified decision maker, or more likely an irritable opinion influencer. Either way, in respect to reliable, prospective contractual renewals, its source was deemed to be a mission critical figure: one wielding personal enmity with minimal concern for … Continue reading Press-ganged

Brigadier Robert D’Alby

A sweaty tale of irresistible desire within remote salty environs. Brigadier Robert D'Alby of those immaculate Glorious Roscommon’s was a fine figure of a man. As a Sandhurst officer cadet, it was crystal clear D’Alby was hewn from exactly the right stuff- possessing athleticism, but devoid of narcissism; employing a military style of life, minus … Continue reading Brigadier Robert D’Alby

Bullworker

Len Sell is principal consultant at Leisure Arts PLC, manufacturer of the world-famous Bullworker- its UK head office based in Kings Cross, a stone’s throw from intelligent cultured people in beautiful Islington, & despite a fair degree of gentrification, still squatting like a melanoma upon the crown of brainy Bloomsbury. Accessing reception via a no-nonsense … Continue reading Bullworker

Antifa Santa

Loony Lennox fucking hated ‘Christmas’, with undisguised passion, nursing a lifelong aversion to its traditional trumpeting of contrived pleasantries once each calendar year; seeing as on all other days, bonhomie is permanently overshadowed, by an oppressively exploitative Plutocratic anti-culture. Indignation erupted, as Len’s instinctive reaction to so many audacious, bold-faced lies, breathtaking public stupidity, palpable … Continue reading Antifa Santa

The Gospel According to Mr. Eric

Happy anniversary Britain! A year ago, on Thursday, December 12, 2019 most of you elected Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson as your saviour, commander-in-chief, & first amongst feudal overlords. So, isn't everyone overjoyed that England today is such a strong & stable Tory safe seat? To mark the occasion, & note that your trusted Conservatives have so … Continue reading The Gospel According to Mr. Eric

Yob

One Enchanted evening in Whites: so, let us start honestly, without indulging in faux ideological one-upmanship, or casually pretending that back-in-the-day I sat in snug splendour upon a warm seat of influence as a committee member in the Comintern; or even gigged as junior editor of Lotta Continua. I did, but that’s a whole new scandal, a cast of … Continue reading Yob

Window Shopping with l’Étranger

In a mall, pressing against those glass exteriors fronting numerous interchangeable shops; it could be an emporium dedicated to exclusive Provençal face cream- whatever, I stare inside like a piqued Martian. Part of the reason I’m outside involves exogenous factors: born into a small family flat, rented by unhappy parents, battling, blaming, adventurously polygamous, accusatory, uneducated, … Continue reading Window Shopping with l’Étranger

Sent from my iPhone

Sent from my iPhone, so please excuse brevity, spelling & punctuation Sent from my iPhone whilst dieting, so please excuse an 8-point-font Sent from my iPhone during a senior moment, so with all due respect Missy- excuse spelling & punctuation Sent from my iPhone clad head-to-toe in hard-wearing corduroy whilst tuning pianoforte along the Cotswold Way, so pitched perfectly- excuse punctuation … Continue reading Sent from my iPhone

Electroman

Electroman is forever here to save our universe from unrelenting obliteration. He’s travelled through valleys of death, survived chasms of fire, & scaled snowy mountains. Marked sigils engraved across his chest pay tribute to derring-do, unparalleled bravery, showing no concern for his personal safety. Only the majesty of Electroman can avert the inevitable. Flashing through … Continue reading Electroman

Another Perfect Day in Fucking Paradise

Ben seems to be the only living person on the planet and the dead are really getting on his nerves. But then he discovers he may not be alone. Can Ben find love among the dead or will death find him first? Another Perfect Day in Fucking Paradise is the fifth novel (or first novella) … Continue reading Another Perfect Day in Fucking Paradise